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College Football

25 most annoying things in college football

Chris Wuensch

By Chris Wuensch

Published:

It’s difficult to criticize something we hold dear to our hearts. But even the love of our life isn’t without his, her or its foibles.

College football isn’t immune and as the 2016 season begins, we’ll be reminded all over again what we love about the sport and of those little idiosyncrasies that send a shiver up our spine and back down again like a visceral reaction to nails — or Will Muschamp’s fist — against a chalkboard.

Here’s a list of the top 25 most annoying things in college football listed in no particular order.

1. Talk of Big 12 Expansion

Quit hemming and hawing and just do it already. A Big 12 with only 10 teams is confounding. And Big Ten? Time to call yourself the Big 14 or lose four teams. Start with Maryland.

2. College Football Playoff Games on New Year’s Eve

College Football Playoff games on New Year’s Eve. What better way to get in a fight with your spouse over your evening’s plans.

3. Icing the Kicker

There’s proof that calling a timeout to give the kicker more time to think doesn’t have much of a benefit. Time to quit delaying the inevitable and put this trend on ice.

4. Dabbing

You know you’ve jumped the shark when your dad, err, we mean Nick Saban gets in on it. Time for a new celebratory trend. Would someone please bring back the Ickey Shuffle?

5. The Term “Football Move”

Well he didn’t make an ice hockey nor water polo move. Ballet pirouette, maybe.

6. Stadium Chants

The Georgia fan will tell you that the “Rocky Top” fight song is the most annoying thing in college football. While the Tennessee loyalist rues the Gator Chomp of the Florida faithful, who, in turn, detests the barking Georgia fan. Anyone outside of Starkville will tell you they could do without Mississippi State’s cowbells. None are worse than Oklahoma’s incessant “Boomer Sooner,” though, am I right?

Don’t worry, your team’s chant is the best.

7. This Motion

We get it, your gloves match up when placed together. I’d start to focus more on catching the ball, Oregon State.

8. Claimed National Titles

The SEC is guilty here of claiming national titles awarded by now-defunct associations. We’re looking in your direction, Kentucky and Ole Miss.

9. Fans Who Live Tweet Games

We’re watching. We saw it also.

10. Four-Team Playoff System

We’ve gotten a taste for a College Football Playoff system, the same way a shark gets a taste for human. Now it’s time to take our ravenous appetite for the sport and feed us an eight-team format.

11. Fans Who Yell “Heisman!”

We’re looking at you, Stanford fan. We get it, you think Christian McCaffrey should win the Heisman. Now please, with all due respect, zip it.

12. People Who Cry That the SEC is Overrated

When your conference wins eight of the last 10 BCS/CFP titles, then we’ll talk.

13. Designer Uniform Trim

What’s with the paisley-type look, Oklahoma State? We’re here to bash each other’s brains in, not strut a fashion runway.

https://twitter.com/AthleteVids/status/705913108024467457

14. Fans with Multiple “Favorite” Teams

You’re not allowed a favorite team on each coast. Pick one and stick with it.

15. Overtime Rules

We already got the College Football Playoff that we clamored for. It’s time to amend the ridiculous overtime rules — NFL included. Let’s keep it simple. If regulation ends in a tie, we play one more full quarter of football and subsequent quarters until the game is settled.

16. Larry Culpepper

Please find a new mascot, Dr. Pepper. Perhaps go the KFC route and create an actual Doctor Pepper.

17. Teams Named Bulldogs, Tigers or Wildcats

Come on, Auburn. Time to switch to the “War Eagles.”

18. Clap Cadence

Of all the Urban Meyer-inspired trends to seep into college football, the clap cadence ranks fairly low on the popularity scale.

19. Arguing Over Satellite Camps

Less sleepovers and more wins perhaps, Mr. Harbaugh?

20. You, the Fans, Apparently

21. Ticky-Tacky Pass Interference Calls

Need an easy 15 yards? Put the ball in the air and have the referees bail you out courtesy of over-sensitive pass interference rules. Plus, why isn’t P.I. in college football a spot foul?

22. Lack of Band Coverage

If the SEC wants to expand its fan base, they should insist that networks start showing the bands at halftime, rather than the mindless chatter of the experts talking heads.

23. Jim Harbaugh, According to Paul Finebaum

If Paul Finebaum says the Michigan coach is annoying, then the brash Wolverines coach is officially annoying.

24. Four-Hour Games

They should be five hours so we get even more college football.

25. Preseason Lists and Prognostications

Everyone’s an expert these days. Seriously, Arkansas to win the SEC West?

Chris Wuensch

Chris Wuensch is a contributing writer for Saturday Down South. He covers South Carolina and Tennessee.

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