Ad Disclosure
Renowned philosopher Mike Tyson once opined that “everyone’s got a plan until they get punched in the mouth.” But that’s not always true – sometimes, all you have is a concept of a plan that ends up getting you punched in the mouth anyway.
Dumb decisions aren’t limited to SEC football, but Saban knows we have seen our fair share of them in the past few years. Here now, behold: The 10 worst concepts of a plan in recent SEC memory!
10. Hugh Freeze challenges for compliance help
Sure, we could have gone with “Hey, Hugh, use a burner next time!” but the real problem with Hubris Hugh Freeze at Ole Miss started in 2013. That’s when Freeze, who was taking online needles for his stellar – and totally legit – recruiting class that included No. 1 overall player Robert Nkemdiche. Freeze took exception, and fired off the following CLASSIC tweet: “If you have facts about a violation, email compliance@olemiss.edu. If not, please don’t slander the young men”
Uh, yeah. “Don’t feed the trolls” should be a standard-issue tattoo straight from the SEC offices. Needless to say, Freeze’s recruiting managed to give Ole Miss plenty of ammo to run him out of town. That and the burner phone thing. …
9. Auburn hires Bryan Harsin
Some things are good, just not good together. You’d never use peanut butter as a pizza topping, for example. Auburn fired Gus Malzahn (a mistake that could have easily made this list …) in 2020 and hired Boise State coach Bryan Harsin less than 2 weeks later. It wasn’t so much that Harsin was a fish out of water in the Loveliest Village on The Plains, but he couldn’t have found said water if he fell out of a boat.
Untoward/unsubstantiated rumors about Harsin co-mingling with a young staffer didn’t help Harsin’s cause. Neither did a 9-12 record in his year-plus before getting Das Boot with a $15.575 million check for his troubles.
8. Texas A&M parts ways with Kevin Sumlin
Hubris comes in many forms, but no stronger was it exhibited in late 2017, when Texas A&M figured it could do way better and canned Kevin Sumlin after six seasons. All Sumlin did was go 51-26 for the Aggies, beat Alabama in Tuscaloosa with 2012 Heisman winner Johnny Manziel, and run a generally clean program.
Sumlin didn’t last on the bread line long, as Arizona hired him. Texas A&M? They went all-in with John James Fisher Jr. How did that turn out? You know, but stay tuned, anyway …
7. Florida fires Dan Mullen
The Gators have been searching high and low for a quality replacement for Steve Spurrier (note how we don’t include Urban Meyer in there, because we used the word “quality” and Meyer’s Swamp Kings weren’t exactly angels) for years now. They burned through the Zooks and Muschamps and McElwains before landing on Dan Mullen – who as an assistant tutored star QBs like Alex Smith (Utah), Heisman Trophy-winner Tim Tebow (Florida) before becoming a head coach and developing Dak Prescott (Mississippi State). He rebuilt MSU’s program, too, leading the Bulldogs to their only 10-win season this century.
He kept winning at Florida, too. But Florida was dissatisfied with Mullen’s 4-year tenure in Gainesville, even with an SEC East title and 2 10-plus-win seasons. Coupled with some extenuating circumstances, they let him go after a 5-6 mark in 2021. That was a mistake, as Billy Napier seemingly has only dragged the Gators down further into the morass than they ever were with Mullen.
6. LSU scheduling Troy in 2017
Paycheck games are typically great for the team writing the check, as you’re willingly trade some dollar signs for an easy nonconference W. And who the heck goes into Death Valley at night and has a chance? No one gave Troy the memo, apparently, as the Trojans waltzed into Baton Rouge and did something no nonconference opponent had done in 17 years – win on LSU’s home turf.
A 3-touchdown underdog, Troy collected $985,000 to deliver arguably LSU’s most embarrassing loss of the 21st century – a 24-21 victory over No. 25 LSU, which came in the first month of Ed Orgeron’s full-time coaching tenure in Red Stick. Ouch.
5. SEC not investing in quality officiating
The botches are legion, so much that if they were people they could fill Birmingham’s Legion Field. SEC officiating continues to be a nearly weekly laughingstock – not just in the conference but when programs around the country get a taste of what we deal with season after season. Ask a fan of any SEC team, and they can quickly and decisively pull an instance where a botched call screwed their team out of a victory.
We don’t pretend to know the answer to the problem, simply because there are so many problems. But going younger with the guys making up the third team on the field in an attempt to keep up with the speed of the game probably wouldn’t hurt. Officiating football at this level ain’t easy, but also shouldn’t be this hard.
4. Tennessee scheduling Georgia State in 2019
A jam-packed Neyland Stadium is a sight to behold, but it is certainly … ahem … different when the Vols are getting their orange and white handed to them by a Sun Belt program that wasn’t even 10 years old. Such was the case in 2019, when Jeremy Pruitt’s ballclub got its rear end handed to it for 60 minutes by Georgia State – a program that started in 2010, had never beaten a Power 5 team and was coming off a 2-10 season.
Tennessee scratched a check to Georgia State for $950,000 just to show up in Knoxville, and all the Vols got for it was a beatdown more lopsided than the 38-30 score indicated – as Tennessee actually punched one in with just seconds to play. Anyone remember Jarrett Guarantano? Exactly.
3. CBS walks away from SEC coverage
There are plenty of things that escape the grasp of common sense in this world, and among them is why CBS chose to walk away from its SEC broadcast coverage. What was a near-religious experience that began every Saturday at 3:30 pm ET with its iconic theme music, the SEC on CBS was it for college football.
Until it wasn’t. When the league expanded, CBS didn’t expand its rights fees paid to the conference – and played hardball with the SEC to the point that what for decades was a harmonious marriage turned noxious as quickly as Kim vs. Kanye. ESPN/ABC eventually got a seat at the table, offered the SEC far more money than CBS was coughing up, and the two headed to the divorce lawyers last season.
2. Jimbo Fisher
That ol’ Jimbo isn’t No. 1 is a miracle, but Texas A&M’s decision to throw a 10-year, $75 million contract at Fisher was plenty bad enough. Fisher was given a plaque at his announcement listing Texas A&M as the national champions of a year that was to be filled in at a later date, but that didn’t even come close to ever happening – as the Aggies went 45-25 under their considerable investment.
More quizzical was the plan to extend Fisher prior to the 2021 season, giving him a deal worth $9 million annually and a buyout so insane that it makes congressional spending look conservative. By the time they passed the hat around College Station late in 2023, Fisher’s Aggies were a lifeless 6-4 and he walked away with a cool $75 million of buyout cash.
1. Nick Saban attempts long field goal in Auburn
Got a second?
Nick Saban wishes he never was granted the final second of regulation in the 78th Iron Bowl. Facing arch-rival Auburn, Saban’s Tide had driven to the Tigers’ 38-yard line when the Jordan-Hare Stadium clock hit triple-zero. After review, it was reset to 0:01, allowing Saban’s Alabama Crimson Tide to attempt a game-winning 57-yard field goal to break a 28-28 tie.
Freshman Adam Griffith didn’t have enough leg to get it to the crossbar, and then-Auburn coach Gus Malzahn’s decision to put Chris Davis at the back of the end zone paid off – as Davis zig-zagged his way 109 yards to the promised land for a staggering 34-28 victory over the top-ranked Tide.
Coined the “Kick Six,” it is seared in Auburn fans’ memories.
Alabama? That’s one concept of a plan they’d like to forget.
An APSE national award-winning writer and editor, David Wasson has almost four decades of experience in the print journalism business in Florida and Alabama. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post, the Los Angeles Times and several national magazines and websites. He also hosts Gulfshore Sports with David Wasson, weekdays from 3-5 pm across Southwest Florida and on FoxSportsFM.com. His Twitter handle: @JustDWasson.
